The Difficulty of Play
Editor’s note: Brianna’s new book, Created to Play: How Taking Hobbies Seriously Grows Us Spiritually, from IVP, is out tomorrow!
My hand drummed against the back of the baby strapped to my chest. While my feet paced the asphalt, my heart pined after the silent campers and tents surrounding me. Humans are supposed to sleep at two in the morning; my nine-month-old hadn’t gotten the memo. The promise of a fun few days as a family quickly turned into stressful bed routines, tears, and late-night pacings around the campground. That trip wasn’t the only one that didn’t go as planned. Throughout our years parenting, my husband and I have learned that playing together as a family doesn’t come free. There are cars to pack, unpack, and vacuum. Sunscreen application never ends, bike tires deflate, and disrupted nap schedules can wreak havoc. I know I’m not alone, for we all face the same feeling every time we return home from a vacation and admit we desperately need another.
Play didn’t always require so much work. Before the fall, rest and play went unmarred from any difficulty, stress, or sorrow. Once sin spread, it touched everything. Paul reminds us that all creation groans for the renewal found in Christ (Rom 8:22). The thorns and thistles of our labor also twist and choke out our leisure. On this side of the fall, the task of packing up our belongings and attending to our children wears on us. We feel the effects in our bodies as our muscles ache, in the complaining attitudes of our family members, and our own patience running thin.
With all this difficulty, we might wonder why the extra struggle is worth it. Why not stay home instead of planning that camping trip? Why not forgo the park because it would be easier? While our play as a family might come with struggle, our persistence will find a greater return.
Serving Another
A three-year-old doesn’t understand how much effort went into a picnic lunch at a splash pad, but his parents do. We know all the extra clothes we had to keep track of, the stroller we moved in and out, and the way our backs groaned as we carried the giant bag across the parking lot. Our child knew only the excitement of the water shooting out like a jet from a mysterious hole in the ground. They knew the delight of the other children screaming and laughing beside them. For one afternoon at the park, we bore the brunt of the curse, so that our child may see only the gifts of the Lord. Without even realizing it, on a simple day at the splash pad, we’ve followed in step behind our Savior.
From the very beginning God promised to bear pain on behalf of us. Before he spoke of the thorns that would come as a result of sin, he extended a promise. “I will put enmity between you and the woman, and between your offspring and her offspring; he shall bruise your head and you shall bruise his heel” (Gen 3:15). This proclamation was the first whisper of the gospel. Though Adam’s sin had brought death, God proclaimed that he would bear the curse in man’s place and bring us salvation (Rom. 5:18). Yet even before his crucifixion, Christ displayed his readiness to bear the curse for our sake. For thirty-three years Christ withstood the aches and pains of humanity, the sorrows of loss, and the anger and impatience of others so that he might give us the greatest of delights. It’s this humility and sacrificial love that Paul calls us to imitate, as we put on the mind of Christ who emptied himself for us (Phil. 2:1-2).
It seems strange to say that a vacation might be one way to bear the curse for another, but it’s no less true. In our play this summer we can model the sacrificial love of Christ as we give up our time in exchange for packing the car so that our children might see the shimmering light dancing atop the lake. We can shrug off the heavy burden of a sleepless night so that our kids can wake with wonder in a tent in the backyard. Of course they will take it for granted at times. How often do we do the same of our own Savior’s gifts? Yet hopefully, as our children grow, they’ll learn from our model and begin to bear the curse by sacrificing their own energy, time, or preferences for their sibling or friend.
Hope in the Disasters
Our exhausting and stressful play isn’t only a sacrifice, but it’s where we’ll find beauty burning strong. Unfortunately we often overlook it because we’re used to sorting our lives into simplistic categories. Something frustrating happens and our day becomes “bad.” Yet this denies the reality of life. Yes, all creation groans, but Paul notes that it groans “in hope” of being set free from its bondage (Rom. 8:20). O. Palmer Robertson explained that the potential of renewal and restoration “stands perpetually alongside the ‘frustration’ arising from the curse.”
Knotted up in between bad moods, tired bodies, and ruined plans weaves hope and renewal. The writer of Ecclesiastes understood this reality as he detailed a life of good right alongside sorrow and sin. Our lives are a tangle of both every single day—vacation or not. In this meshed life, God works and gives. He grows us more like him within the knots, and he also showers us with his gifts (Jas. 1:17).
Our tired bodies still get to be awed by the mountains on the horizon. The fight with our spouse in the morning can be restored into a day of delight as a family. The ruined plans can give way to laughter at the table with a game. By his mercy, our Lord graciously weaves in his renewal, redemption, and his inexpressible joy within our discouragements and difficulties.
The exhaustion I felt pacing the campground with my daughter wasn’t the only feeling I had that trip. My heart also filled with joy as I pushed her around in the stroller with my husband. My smile beamed as I heard her laughter while playing on the bed in our camper. Yes, playing together as a family requires a lot of work, but the delight we can both give and receive from our Father might send us packing up, one more time.
- The Difficulty of Play - May 18, 2026
Thank you for this! I never thought of our family trips as spiritual, and I certainly never considered all the work I was doing for them an act of imitating my Lord. You\\\’ve redeemed camping for me! I seriously think I would have quit without this essay. Thank you!!!