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The Dining Habits of Polonius Wheeler

September 18, 2015 by S. D. Smith 4 Comments

sheep eating giant1

Art by Zach Franzen

—

The Dining Habits of Polonius Wheeler

By S. D. Smith

THERE was a large giant who lived in the woods,
His name was Polonius Wheeler.
He mostly was nice, just a singular vice,
He sometimes became a sheep-stealer.

Wheeler rolled in, nonchalant, to the meadow,
And much to the shepherd’s chagrin.
He grabbed wriggling bunches and gobbled with munches,
The poor, little lambs near to him.

But what was our sad, huge Polonius to do,
With an appetite fixed upon lamb?
Nibble on finches? Settle for pinches,
Of berries, and jellies, and jam?

One must have meat, whatever your size,
Sparing people, what else can he do?
He must balance his diet, without causing riots,
For giants need some protein too.

Let him gobble a chubby white sheep now and then,
And let him eat cake without fuss.
For if he began fancying Englishmen,
He’d sniff and come swiftly for us.

 

–

(Note: This poem and art have appeared here on SW before, a few years ago.) 

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S. D. Smith
S. D. Smith
S. D. Smith is the award-losing author of The Green Ember Series. Sam loves chocolate chip cookies, soccer, and knights who kill dragons.
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Zach Franzen
Zach Franzen
Zach Franzen was a kid just like everyone else, only with more Zs in his name than most (2).

You can find more of his work online at zachfranzen.com and on Instagram @zachfranzen.
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Filed Under: For Kids, Poetry

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Comments

  1. Ken Priebe says

    September 18, 2015 at 1:48 pm

    Love it! Most excellent!

    Reply
    • S.D. Smith says

      September 21, 2015 at 10:05 pm

      Thanks! That means a lot coming from you.

      Reply
  2. Kobi says

    September 19, 2015 at 9:41 am

    Clever! My kids will love this.

    Reply
    • S.D. Smith says

      September 21, 2015 at 10:06 pm

      Thanks!

      Reply

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