Dog the Bear and Bear the Dog
Dog the Bear and Bear the Dog
by S.D. Smith, illustrated by Aedan Peterson
There once was a dog whose full name was “Bear,”
And a bear whose full name was “Dog,”
On one side of the forest, a log fell on Bear,
On the other, Dog fell on a log.
It might have been confusing, I know, I know,
But neither of them knew the other.
And poor Dog had only a brother, aged seven,
and Bear only had seven brothers.
Dog hibernated, as all bears will do,
And they wisely let sleeping Bear lie,
Bear chewed on bones, but Dog ate four people,
Thus Dog was unbearably wide.
If it seems too painful, to think of ole’ Dog,
Eating four people, then belching,
Know none were nice and all had once eaten,
Bear meat –and got second helpings!
Bear had himself, never eaten a man,
Though one said, “You smell like a skunk!”
He then kicked Bear, but Bear did not eat him,
Only chewed a quite generous chunk.
So, these two had had run-ins with humans,
And humans had run in to them,
But again, they had never, ever once met and,
That’s usually where stories begin.
It might begin with them shaking hands,
And hitting it off from the start,
But neither Bear, nor Dog, even had hands!
And Bear hated “shake” from the heart.
Once a railway man had taught Bear to “shake,”
To “roll over” and “play dead” for groups,
But that day on the train, when commanded, “Obey!”
Bear bit him upon on his caboose.
Dog, likewise, had quite a career,
He had once been a great circus bear.
But he drew the line and abandoned the job,
When they made him wear pink underwear!
So Dog was a bear and yes, Bear was a dog,
And Dog, the bear, could be scary,
But Bear the dog, wasn’t nearly as doggy,
As Dog was so splendidly beary.
If they ever met, but didn’t ever get to–
“My name is,” –to the point where you share it.
I think an oddness would dog Bear all his days,
And that Dog couldn’t possibly bear it.
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Loved this, Sam! Aedan, great illustrations–especially the pink underwear.
Thanks!
Well, that was delightful. Sam’s trademark silly wit is always welcome, and Aedan — well, that was a splendid capture of the kooky and the tragic.
Watch for Aedan’s collection, “Kooky Tragedies,” coming soon.
Very silly, giggles all around. The closing couplet is especially marvelous. And the artwork, just perfect. I love these Friday bits!
Thanks, Amy L! Aedan is such a great illustrator. If I could do anything that well at 15, I’d be a retired millioniare living in the south of France, WV right now.
Wait. I’m confused…. 😉
It’s simple. They are all half-bear/half-animals, including the non-humans.
O-o-oh. Now I am enlightened. You have a truly terrifying brain, S.D.
Way to go Aedan!
YES!
Thanks dude.
This was indeed wonderfully silly. Thank you for a great end to a somewhat draining week.
You’re welcome! Aedan and I were aiming to help the Athletic Directors of the world be able to relax and ease into the weekend. Thanks, AD!
Sam, you made me laugh again. I’ve been accused of being many things but no one; EVER, could accuse me of being an athletic director.
Love
Aunt Deb
Mystery solved. I’m no Basil of Baker Street.
The poem is fine and all, but that BEAR IS GREAT.
Your head is fine and all.
Until I looked carefully, realized what this site was and who S.D. Is, I thought this story was much older. It reminds me of the poems and stories my Hoosier Gma used to read me.
And obviously the artist has been working on his craft for years. Love it.
That’s so kind! I want to hear some Hoosier Gma poems.
The artist is, as they say, The Man.
High five Aedan! You’re a published illustrator! You did an excellent job. Looking forward to seeing more from you on the blog!
Best,
Will
I love everything about this! Aedan….what a perfect illustration for this piece. I look forward to seeing much more from you.
Well done! I loved the line “Only chewed a quite generous chunk.” And the ringmaster in the background of the drawing has great personality contrasting the attitude of the bear perfectly!
Hi everyone!
So many kind comments! I’m glad you enjoyed the illustration. Thanks for the support.
Aedan
It really is excellent, Aedan. The expression on that poor bear speaks worlds.
Thanks!
So cute! My 5yo: “But why is the bear a dog?” 🙂
And Aeden, bravo! So great to see your work here!